popplers

E-ticket ride

Yesterday, it hit 91° (a record high). I didn't go hiking. I didn't go to the beach. I didn't bask in the air-conditioned glory of the local cineplex. I spent yesterday at an ex-army base, on hot tarmac, driving around (and over) a sea of orange cones.

Yep, the S2000 and I finally tried autocross. The New England Sports Car Club offered its Solo II School yesterday, so I got up at 6 a.m., loaded up the car, and drove out to Devens. My co-worker Jane had already set up a tarp, so I parked next to her Audi TT and got my car ready to be checked by the tech guys. I pulled everything out of the trunk and set it up. I removed the car mats. I went to check the tire pressure, and found that Chang had already inflated the tires to 45 p.s.i.(!)

There were some very nice cars there. Besides Jane's TT, there were the requisite Miatas and WRXs, a few BMWs, lots of Hondas. And a red Ferrari 308 GTS (the same car that Magnum PI drove). And not one, but two gorgeous, brand-new, British Racing Green Lotus Elises.

The morning started out with the aforementioned tech check. Then there was an hour of classroom time (held in the shady patch next to a motor home), where we sat on folding chairs and Chang went over the basics of autocross. At this point, we broke up into groups— two intermediate groups, and three groups of n00bs. I was in Group B, which consisted of the Ferrari 308 GTS, the Audi TT, one of the Elises, an older convertible BMW, and something else that I can't remember. And our first lesson was the Slalom.

There were 2 sets of cones set up, so you'd drive down one slalom set, and then drive back to the start on the other slalom set. And then you'd get back in line and do it again. There were 3 instructors in our group, and they would switch off between riding in your car and instructing you, and driving your car to show you how it's done. When Instructor Kevin drove my car, I felt like I was on the Cyclone. The first set of slalom cones were spaced closer together, so you couldn't go as fast. The second set were farther apart, so you could get up to 35-40 mph. I spent the whole day in 2nd gear. Somewhere during slalom practice, I really started to feel like autocross was not the sport for me. I felt queasy, and I was really having difficulty understanding why someone would want to do this to his car. But I kept getting back in line and trying to pay attention to all the different things that you're supposed to pay attention to (look ahead! smooth turn! back side of the cone! steady speed! look ahead! have an aneurysm! don't hurl!) and driving it over and over and over again. And then it was time for the Kidney Bean.

The Kidney Bean, not too surprisingly, is a course laid out in the shape of a kidney bean. There are increasing radius turns and decreasing radius turns, and a small slalom in the middle. You can't see any of this at first glance, though. Mostly it looks like an explosion at the traffic cone factory. But the instructors walked through the course with us, and explained what would be happening and where we should be looking. And then we got in our cars and drove the course slowly a few times (again, talking about what should be happening at a given point). Repeat, only faster. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. At some point in here, I stood out on the course and re-set any cones that got knocked over during someone's run. Thankfully, most people didn't knock over very many. Did I mention that it was frickin' hot? OK, now start driving it in the clockwise direction, if you can figure out the course. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. (Look ahead! Accelerate! Back side of the cone! Brake! Accelerate! Outside edge! Look ahead! Brake! Accelerate! Look ahead!) This started to get fun again, and was not nearly as queasy-making as the slalom. Next: Offsets.

The final lesson of the day was Offsets. There were cones set up in a zig-zag at the extreme edges of the runway, and the goal is to drive big smooth arcs (half circle in one direction, half circle in the other. The steering wheel is never pointed straight, because you're immediately transitioning into the next turn (look ahead! look ahead! look ahead!). This part was definitely fun, although my brain was starting to melt as we hit the hottest part of the day.

After all of the lessons, there was a mini-autocross course. As before, we walked the course with an instructor, then drove it with him. Then the instructor drove it while I sat in the passenger seat. Repeat, repeat, repeat. I got to wave the green start flag while the other set of drivers went through their runs. Then 4 more runs for me, followed by another stint of flag-waving.

Instructor Kevin exhorted me to really push my car, saying "You haven't even spun it today, have you?" So, during my penultimate run, I really pushed it, and was "rewarded" with a 270° spin-out during the final offsets. It was fun, but that blew my time. I tried pushing it during my final run too, but my overall time was slow. I did better when I pushed it less but paid more attention to the course and timing, and I don't yet have enough brain cells to do both things at the same time.

By the end of the day (~5 p.m.), I was wiped. Went back to my "camp", loaded up the car, let down the tire pressure, and put the roof up. Cranked the A/C, and waited for my brain to re-solidify. As the car cooled down, I realized that I was ravenously hungry.

Nothing prepared me for the sound of an autocross. There is a constant background of engine and tire shriek, not just from your course, but from all of the other areas at the event. Driving home, I could still hear all of those sounds in my head, like when you play Quake for too long. I also can't believe how tired I am (although I think part of that is due to the heat) and sore. That said, it was a lot of fun and I'll do it again (preferably on a cooler day).

Posted by rv at June 26, 2005 10:00 AM to geek