I was looking at the BBC News Day in Pictures feature, where I came across a picture of Prince Harry on an army exercise, all camo-ed up and looking very G.I. Joe (2nd photo in the series). According to the caption, he "announced he is to join the Blues and Royals regiment of the Household Cavalry." Which got me thinking, how cool would it be to have a Household Cavalry? After you'd had an exceptionally fabulous dinner party with lots of guests, you could call in the Cavalry and they'd load the dishwasher, take out the trash, rinse out all the empties and put them in the bin, clean the red wine stains off the carpet, vacuum up the crumbs, and any other tedious post-soirée housework.
Or if you spent the whole day baking cookies for Christmas and the kitchen was a disaster and you didn't want to cook dinner— call in the Household Cavalry! I wonder if there is a waiting list (to be served by them, that is; I'm sure that there isn't a waiting list to join). It would be like having kitchen fairies, only much more butch.
And next the men of the Second Armoured Division regale us with their famous close order swanning about…Posted by rv at January 25, 2006 12:51 PM to news
If you are well-off enough to have a household calvary, you already have _servants_ to do all that stuff for you. The Cavalry is used for bringing children up to bed ("For Queen and Country! To the Nursery!") and routing the House Rodentia from their assault on the kitchens.
The Servants HATE the Cavalry. The horses are constantly scratching the ballroom floor (which must be sanded and buffed by Tuesday next), they soil the billiard room, and they graze on the tapestries. The men are lecherous toward both the maids and the valets indiscriminantly, and set up their tents in the most inconvenient of locations.
Because of this, the once-typical Houshold Cavalry of the 1700s has been largely replaced by television by the 2000s. Only the Royal Family has the wherewithall to continue to keep one.
Posted by: poz at January 25, 2006 02:16 PMPoz, this is brilliant!
Posted by: chrism at January 25, 2006 03:58 PMI am imagining the Household Cavalry with pantomime horses (and, of course, a pantomime Princess Margaret).
Regarding lechery: according to the Household Cavalry web page (I kid you not), The Household Cavalry welcomes applications from eligible candidates no matter what their, marital status, race, ethnic religion or belief. It has a strict code of conduct covering racial discrimination and harassment.
There is also a Household Cavalry Museum.
Lacking the wherewithal for servants and/or Household Cavalry, I suppose I will rely on the television.
Posted by: rv at January 25, 2006 04:11 PM